Death by Hopelessness

I find it offensive when people criticize the most relevant organization the world has ever known, the church. However, there is a troublesome truth that is suppressed and ignored. So, I am writing this not to attack the true church. No, there is nothing wrong with the one made up of believers. This is about the corporate one. If what I reveal here applies to them, they can own what needs to be owned. If not, then praise God.

What or Who?

If you put all the believers of Christ in one bucket, that is the church. Those corporations around the world called churches, those are not the actual body of Christ. The church is the universal body of believers around the globe. Don't miss this, that building you see on nearly every downtown corner with the name "so and so church" isn't the church. The church is, in fact, the "body of Christ"; that non-profit corporation that bought the land, built a building, or is renting is not the church. "God, who made the world and everything in it, since He is Lord of heaven and earth, does not dwell in temples made with hands." Acts 17:24. One is not the other; all organizations claim to be the church but are, in fact, not the actual church. Matthew 18:20: "For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them." When believers gather in his name, that is the church, not the corporation.

Let this be clear: You have that right as an American. It is a privilege for which people have fought and died. However, know that the corporation you attend is not indwelled by the Holy Spirit. That corporation may or may not be led by members of the universal body of Christ known as the church. Furthermore, the teachings and practices may or may not represent Christ's teachings. The question is, who is the church? Or, what is the church? How you frame that question determines if it is the not-for-profit corporation or the universal body of believers in the world.

False Teachings

It took me years to see this, and I have finally come to grips with it. The practice of several mainline denominations is not to be satisfied with the cross work of Christ; Christ' substitutionary atonement only applies to some people. The ones that the Gospel does not apply to are condemned before the foundation of the world. If that were true, then that God is evil. Imagine creating someone for the sole purpose of eternally torturing them, giving them no pathway to redemption? This is precisely what many teach and practice in their denominations.

Thankfully, from the beginning to the present time, God foreknows who would and will believe; those are the people who have repented of their unbelief by their own free will and by faith and have believed God. This is precisely how sin came into our world (Adam chose to not believe God) and how eternal life comes to anyone who believes; it is the unlimited offer of eternal life. "And he believed in the Lord; and he counted it to him for righteousness." Genesis 15:7, Romans 4:4, the Apostle Paul quotes Genesis to teach how a person is declared righteous in God's Kingdom. "For what saith the scripture? Abraham believed God, and it was counted unto him for righteousness."

John 1-11 is the preamble to the Gospel of John, and verses 12 and 13 are foundational to the entire New Testament. "But as many as received him, to them gave he power to become the sons of God, even to them that believe on his name: Which were born, not of blood, nor of the will of the flesh, nor of the will of man, but of God." John clarifies this even more in 3:16, "For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life." Whosoever believeth could not be more precise, the belief changes everything, a person is born from above, of God by belief, i.e. faith.

When anyone throughout history believes the Lord, believes God, that person is declared righteous in God's Kingdom. Two essential facts, Hebrews 6 tells us that God's decision is immutable; secondly, he does not and will not change His mind. "That by two immutable things, in which it was impossible for God to lie, we might have a strong consolation, who have fled for refuge to lay hold upon the hope set before us: Which hope we have as an anchor of the soul, both sure and stedfast..." Hebrews 6:18-19. Find anywhere in the Bible where he changed his mind after God declared someone righteous. Although many false teachers try, there are no conditions or mentions of this essential information. In conclusion, the hope revealed by the Gospel is for everyone, from Adam to the last man on earth.

Hopeless

Winston Churchill once said, "...it is a wicked thing to take away man's hope." Many organizations treat some members as if they are no longer fully righteous in God's Kingdom. The next step for each new believer is to be identified as a believer (baptism) and then discipleship. Discipleship is receiving the Word of God from those who know the Scriptures. For Timothy, it was his grandmother and mother. Those corporations permanently ban them from exercising spiritual gifts in their corporation under their interpretation of the rules of the qualifications set forth by that corporation. The problem is the qualifications set forth in Scripture are ideal. Furthermore, they are intended for the literal body of Christ. If a corporation desires to create its own versions based on its culture, that is their right, but it does misrepresent the truth conveyed in Scripture, and it violates what Paul writes in 2 Corinthians 5:17 "Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new." "All things are become new" literally means (in the present tense) we are becoming new every day; the old things, including divorce or other situations, are gone. 

For the divorced person, no pathway back to a state of grace is offered. Furthermore, remarriage, according to many of these organizations, is automatically considered adulty; some will grant the divorce if their spouse is continuing in an adulterous relationship. I have witnessed firsthand the only explanation, "It is a consequence of your sin..." Ironically, no one who is divorced doesn't feel and experience the continual condemnation that is already associated with divorce. The suffering of the economic, sociological, and pain of continual separation from children and ruined holidays isn't enough; we must add the state of perpetual sin that has no redemptive path from the teachings of the church. 

When a doctrine leads to hopelessness and death, it isn't just wrong but evil. It is a well-documented fact that divorced men are nine times more likely than divorced women to die by suicide. Generally, it is a 3.5 to 1 ratio for all men and women. But, for the divorced, death is nine times more deadly for men than women. Women are the initiators in about 70% of all divorces. Even worse, 40 percent of children who died by suicide had experienced multiple traumatic events, including divorce. These realities and facts are all but ignored by the corporations who act as if they represent God on this matter.

No Path to Redemption

Many divorced men no longer see the point of participating in fellowshipping of these corporations until a pathway is formally offered; it is an exercise in futility. From the Old Testament, they had, after seven years, the year of Jubilee, for us, in the church age, silence. There is no path, no solution, no redemption, nothing. Then it begs the question, if there is no valid path to a state of grace, have we lost our salvation? Has God declared us unrighteous? Is God's atonement limited to those whose marital status is God's original purpose?

Anyone who has, whether of their own accord or as a result of martial abandonment, is somehow perpetually out of fellowship with God? Shouldn't all divorced people be cast out of the church for church discipline? Or, like most of us, should we quietly sit there and play along with a practice that leaves us; a scarlet letter Christian? I wonder if the teachings and practices align with Jesus' teachings. If so, then once you have ruined your life with divorce, there is no path; you have committed the unpardonable sin; maybe the catholic church is correct, and you have committed a mortal sin, no hope, no grace, no mercy, no path back.

The Great Hyprocisy

The question must be: are we forgiven? Is our sin as far from the east as to the west? Have we been declared righteous by faith or not? Are the works of faithful marriage counted as righteousness or not? There is a contradiction between teaching to practice and application. That contradiction has a name for it: hypocrisy. In this hypocrisy, Romans 8:1 does not apply.

I know I am not the only one who has felt this way for a long time, felt the condemnation, and experienced the ridicule and mockery for multiple failed marriages. Imagine how many times I have heard the passage preached, "a one-woman man..." and then the pastor jokes, "one woman at a time..." and the congregation laughs; it is not funny to those of us who have been rejected by spouses repeatedly, that pain never goes away.

Children of Divorce Parents

The church corporations wonder why GENZ and Millenials are leaving the church; I know one reason: they saw how their faithful parents are imputed as unrighteous by the church due to failed marriages. The kids know; they see and understand. Then they ask, "Where is the path back to grace for my dad or mom?" Again, the same word is used: hypocrisy. 

The practices of leadership rejection of divorced men are devastating; as I already reported, the study about suicide in men also reported: "...the risk of suicide among divorced men was over twice as likely as that of married men, whereas, in women, there was no statistical difference in married and divorced women." Let that sink in. Divorced men and women are treated very differently in the church and in society.

Condemnation 

One observation I had recently was from John 4, Jesus, and the women at the well. I have heard messages and teachings on this passage and many experiences against this woman; contextually, nowhere does it say she was divorced or had done wrong; Jesus only identifies that she is living at a man's house who is not her husband, didn't say she was a fornicator, Jesus never rebukes her, (like the woman caught in adultery in John 8 "Go and sin no more." That woman is thrown under the bus all the time; maybe she was a widow five times over, the Scripture does not say. My point is that we assume a person who has been married five times is not in a state of grace. Ironically, she was waiting for Messiah to return; all of us scarlet letter Christians are waiting, too. In the meantime, it's a lonely, isolated, dangerous time for divorced men; we wonder if this verse even applies. The false teachings lead us down a hopeless, dark path. "Therefore if any man be in Christ he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things have become new." 2 Cor. 5:17. Does the truth claim in the verse apply to divorce or not? What does all things mean?

I will let God decide based on what he has already promised; he can cast me into the lake of fire or welcome me into eternity. Until then, I will quietly serve outside the corporation in the true body of Christ as a wise elder. My life verse is from King David, the famous adulterer: "Then will I teach transgressors thy ways; and sinners shall be converted unto thee" (Psalm 50:13). If you are looking for a corporation to serve and you are divorced or remarried, seek one that says, "Your sins are forgiven. Are you being faithful now?" You can easily find these church corporations; they usually are multiplying, are not legalistic, and are constantly criticized by the legalist corporation church leaders who have cult-like followers.